My photo
mommy. wife. teacher. yogini. writer. coffee drinker. aunt. crocheter. reader. dog lover. scattered. methodical. rational. irrational. paranoid. annoyed. lost. found. content. searching. peaceful. i am constantly in search of my story. the one i have never happened. the one i've lived i cannot write.

16 September 2014


those who know me best
know that i have not been the best me
in recent 


most days
many days
my body is merely a vessel
taking up physical space
my mind
my heart
my soul
my spirit
all seem to be drifting
having abandoned my floating limbs
bound for places unknown.

i throw out ropes
in the hope
of pulling the pieces back.

i pull in lyrics
dusty book jackets
forgotten dreams
faded photographs
and frantically lick them
hoping to make them stick.

sometimes they do
even if only for mere moments
but are usually pulled apart
by some unforeseen current again.

i dive
into former lives
in the hope of collecting 
that can help me make sense
of this drifting. 

the uprooting. 
the anemia. 
the missing dirt under my fingernails. 
the minutes that tic and toc 
through my fingertips. 
the missed sunsets. 
the idle pages. 
the fraying yarn. 

too much caffeine. 
too little leafy greens. 
too much technology. 
too little creativity. 

i'm adrift. 
but the shore can't be far. 
so i continue to paddle
that the horizon is just over the crest. 


and yes
sweet Bug. 
your mama writes. 
my words are not meant to be secret. 
it's just that sometimes
they sink to the bottom
and i forget to catch them
before they settle on the floor. 

i forget. 
but i hope you will remember
to hold onto your words 
through the waves
and the pools
for they may be the life preserver 
that keeps you afloat. 

go well. 

1 comment:

Jackie said...

What can I say, but send my hopes and dreams to you hoping you will find your way back to the center again.
I'm always in your corner and know your faith, strength and family will help you along the way. Once again of many times you've not only brought me to tears but sent me into a spin of thinking of my own life.

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