me.

My photo
mommy. wife. teacher. yogini. writer. coffee drinker. aunt. crocheter. reader. dog lover. scattered. methodical. rational. irrational. paranoid. annoyed. lost. found. content. searching. peaceful. i am constantly in search of my story. the one i have never happened. the one i've lived i cannot write.

11 October 2010

30 lessons OR chapter 30 part 2.

i have marked my 30th year
here.

its a very strange number for me to wear
because so often
i still feel i wear the insecurities
and uncertainties
of 18.

for example.

when i got pregnant
i was fearful i would be 'judged' for being too young
and then realized that i had nearly seven years of marriage under me
and 26 years of life.

or when i get called down to the principal's office...
still makes me feel like i'm wearing 18
and being called in for having missed choir.

and when my guy kisses me
it makes me feel 18 and silly
all over again.

the truth is
there are a lot of truths i have not uncovered
that i thought i would have uncovered
by the time i donned 30.

and the pieces that make me me
are still scattered on the floor
but as i look at the big picture
i realize that the puzzle is more complete now
than it was a year ago
three years ago
twelve years ago...

and so.
i wanted to take this time
and mark my 30th year
with 30 (of the many) lessons
i have learned
some on my own
some with the help of others.
  1. experience your children.
  2. create moments of connection within yourself.
  3. exercise and eat your vegetables...organic ones if possible.
  4. coffee is good for you (and ultimately saves the lives of many students/spouses/children)
  5. create, listen to and dance to music; at least one of these once a day.
  6. make time to hold your love and share quiet conversations in whatever moments you can find.
  7. our bodies are vessels; vessels of strength, health and love.  they are also canvases that you can adorn with ink, scars and laugh lines.
  8. yoga heals.
  9. you cannot change people.  you can only change the way you respond to them (thanks, mom.)
  10. it is important to never go to bed angry (thanks, dad.)
  11. be creative.  draw, paint, scrapbook, knit, write, photograph, move furniture...whatever it is, do it.
  12. live for today; let the road carry you and be willing to abandon your 'plans'.
  13. despite number 12, it is also important to note that there is value to be found in routine and consistency.
  14. giving is far more rewarding and fulfilling than getting.
  15. age happens.  and that's okay.
  16. forgive.  (i'm still working on this one.)
  17. tofu kinda rocks my world.  
  18. embrace animals into your family.  
  19. no matter what, nothing is ever that bad (again, thanks dad.)
  20. i am not what happened to me.  i am what i choose to become (thank you, jung.)
  21. it is important essential to find something positive in each person you encounter (still working on this one too, in some cases.)
  22. date night is a must.  date days are even better.  date weeks are off the charts.  it is important for your child(ren) to see you and your significant other do things together...without them.
  23. God is good.
  24. i am a better version of myself when i get to be alone with myself for awhile.
  25. i am easily prone to distraction, procrastination and overstimulation.  
  26. do not be afraid of how the world perceives you.  be you anyway.
  27. it is important to read lots of stuff.  magazines, smutty novels, classics, memoirs, stereo directions.  read read read.
  28. recycle (both physically and literally.  aluminum cans, glass, newspapers, dreams, taste in music, skinny jeans...whatever the case may be.)
  29. never lose a moment to tell someone you love them.
  30. live every day like it is your last. 
i realize that the last one is a bit cliche. 
but after that moment
two years ago
when we nearly lost it all...
i hang onto each breath i get
each hug that comes from my girl
each kiss from my guy
each giggle shared between family.

i have so much left to learn
but am so thankful for the lessons i can pocket
and hand down.

to another year
full of
kisses
hugs
giggles
down dogs
cups of coffee
cold wet noses
date nights
game nights
sick days
cartoons
balls of yarn
snuggles
experiences
love
and 
lessons.




 






go well.



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