not great lengths
but i have been consistent
and of that i am proud.
the phrase that keeps rattling in my head
is the one i heard last week
while catching a rerun of
after going home
and working her ass off
ran a marathon.
the giddiness was evident on her face
as she bounced on her toes at the starting line.
the footage of her pushing toward the finish line
but it was at the completion of the race
that she said,
'i just became the woman
i always wanted to be.'
and i thought
so very clearly to myself
that that is who i want to be.
it's not that i want to be the skinny girl
(although a yogi's body would be nice)
it's not that i want to be the woman that gets ogled in the bar
(if you know me at all, then you are painfully aware of my social phobias)
it's not even that i care if i fit into a size smaller
(although, i wouldn't complain if i were forced to purchase new pants)
it's that i want to be the girl at the finish line.
i want to be the girl who overcomes the odds.
i want to be a better
version of me
for my family
for my daughter.
i want to run on beaches
i want to run around the block
i want to run.
i want to become the girl
i always wanted to be.
who do you want to be?